Stop. Turn around.

Don’t try to make me feel guilty.  It doesn’t work.
I’m not like you: I don’t get hurt by the cold shoulder, or lack of eye contact, or (gasp) louder-than-a-whisper asides made about me.
I do NOT ask you drive me all over town.  So I am shy (rude?!) sometimes.  So I don’t want to have dinner with your cousin.  Guess what?  I never said I wanted to, you never asked if I wanted to, it’s not like anyone likes me anyway, and I’m fucking tired of everyone commenting on how goddamned quiet I am.
And by the way, if I DO go to your gayass uncomfortableasfuck dinner, it’s only so you’ll take me to _________________ today.

Fuck you, fuck your stupid anger, fuck your shit.
Fuck me for caring enough to even write this.
And fuck me again for my bribery.

You know what I hate more than (almost) anything in the world?  Twilight.  And all the other books in that “saga.”  No, no, no; I apologize.  I am taking out my frustration on the wrong thing here.  I’m not going to punish the books being read for the annoyance caused by the people reading them.  Sorry.
The books can stay, Stephenie Meyer can stay.  Anyone who drools over it can go.

TO ALL THE obsessed TEENAGE GIRLS:
Edward. Isn’t. Fucking. Real.  Neither is Jacob.  Neither is Bella, or Emmett, or Alice, or whoever else I left out.
I completely understand loving a novel.  However.  Most of you only started the books because your friend read it, or you heard about the movie, blahblahblah.  The way I see it, you only have a right to like the books if you read them BEFORE June of 2008.  If you started them after that, I hope you are enjoying your downward-spiral-of-a-life.
TO ALL THE TEENAGE GUYS:
Thank you to whoever isn’t “trying to be someone’s Edward.”

I urge everyone to keep this in mind: Robert Pattinson has a fear of showering.  Taylor Lautner was Shark-Boy.  WhateverthehellBella’srealnameis had a boyfriend of FOUR YEARS before she wanted to boost her publicity and “marry” Rob.

Bella the Man and Robert Pattinson: I drink to your divorce. :)

I’m not denying it, I’m not endorsing it: I have changed in the recent weeks and months, and I’ve changed a lot.  No, that doesn’t sound right.  I’m still the same, I’m just more mature now.  I suppose you could call this “growing up too quickly.”

You might feel like I’m “phasing you out” as a friend.  I would say that isn’t true, but I can’t say that and feel like I’m being completely honest.  In a lot of cases, it isn’t you, it’s me: I’m going through one of those stages, and I’ve been really focused on school.  However, in a lot of cases, I’ve just “grown away” from you.  Either way, don’t take it personally.  Give me time.  Who knows, maybe I’ll snap out of whatever it is that I’m feeling.

That’s all I’m going to say about this.  Just thought you might want to know whatthefuck is going on with me.